Friday, May 17, 2013
I love it when I do that crying because I’m so happy thing.
have you tried it?
It is really, really lovely.
If that means I’m a lunatic,
so be it.
I’d rather cry because I’m so freaking happy and grateful that I cannot contain it and it bursts out my eyes,
than cry because I’m sad.
I have cried because I’m sad enough times.
I am not sad,
I am Magickal. (am M - a magickal Meliss.....coincidence??)
You can be whatever you want to be.
But back to the crying because I’m happy.....
I can tell you it is from this place:
I am just so freaking relieved that I am living a life I love.
AND part of that is that I am creating things in these todays that past me would have completely freaked out over and said, “I wish I did that!!!”
And then felt bad, pathetic, unable, hopeless, lost, worthless, pointless, completely untalented, hence nothing I could ever make would be as wonderful as that, so why even bother?
AND instead of all that junk.....
I am delighted.
(And magickal, I tell myself not to forget)
I can also tell you,
when that moon looked like it shook and changed color and the music hit that note at the same time.......
My heart said, Wow.
Not only magick,
but to prove that,
it was a partial accident.
I DID NOT plan that.
Here’s how it came about from my perspective:
Recording video while holding the camera steady in your hand (or hands) is nearly impossible.
Especially when you’re trying to focus in on one particular object.
So the moon was shaking and moving all around,
(my hands weren’t shaking, it was the moon - a’la The Hubby)
so much so that it was no longer in focus
and ‘The Man in the Moon’ wasn’t there.
One of the beautiful parts of a full moon is seeing all the details in it.
So, I wanted to cut the part of the detail-less full moon out
and find something more,
I looked ahead and found a place where the moon was steady and in focus
and furthermore, I chose a place where the moon was more at the top of the frame,
where my cut would be ending,
so the cut would not be as noticeable -
as far as the moon wasn’t here and then suddenly somewhere completely different.
The chink in my plan was,
as I went further in the video,
I found the sky had gone black,
instead of that pretty blue,
and the moon had gone yellow,
instead of that gleaming white.
It's gonna be noticeable.
What I usually do in these situations is,
Work With It.
I said to myself,
Cut it anyway.
Try it out and see how it looks.
So, I do.
it looks darn good.
I move on to something else.
Eventually, I got to the place where I was adding in the music.
I began it at the beginning this time, instead of letting it come in after the ‘presents’ part, mostly because I had more music than video this time, but if I used only one song, I would have too much video.....
Ah, the quandaries of video making.
When I tested it and the music synced up with the word presents and then with the change of the moon......
I knew that’s exactly how the video would begin.
I’ve come to realize,
That’s part of the magick of my life.
Sometimes I do not quite understand how these videos come together,
but they seem to.
A page shows up.
A name shows up.
Music reveals its-self based off of what the page looks like.
I cut things out.
I cut more.
I add stuff.
And when I start to put it together,
magickal moments occur......
That’s when I know I’m on the right track
and I am bringing something special to Life.
I am just so happy being able to do what I do.
And I want that for You,
All of You.
I want you to be happy in your life.
God, whatever you do,
just be happy,
just make yourself happy so that whatever you’ve gone through is worth it!
Make The Tragic that is built into Life worth it.
Don’t avoid The Tragic.
It is a complete waste of time.
You cannot avoid it.
“I am alive, comes with the tragic.” Ke$ha - Animal
Instead, focus your energy on creating moments that delight Your Being.
It keeps The Tragic in check.
Also knowing what The Tragic is helps.
I’ve found it isn’t always Death.
Dying is not the worst thing that can happen to anyone or anything.
It is simply a part of the mechanics of Life that anyone or anything that is alive will experience.
“We cannot escape life by dying.” Realization of Oneness - Joel S. Goldsmith
The two people I said that to went -
“Wow......say it again?”
We cannot escape life by dying.
Blows my mind....
like that Billboard Remix of Animal by Ke$ha.
But, try that crying because you’re so happy thing though......
It’s a rush.
ps: I see 'my Papa' Tim Burton in that last one. :)